why?

After a busy day of fun in Myrtle Beach I crawled under the thin sheets and crispy comforter of the hotel bed. I never knew when I feel asleep peacefully that I would wake up to chaos.

My sleepy eyes opened and saw a stretcher in front of my bed going into my parent’s bedroom. I woke up as quickly as I could my heart beating so fast I automatically shot up and ran to my Mom. She was kneeling on the bed holding her chest. It’s a picture that as a seven year old you never want to remember, but unfortunately you never forget. While they put her on the stretcher and wheeled her out of the room the tears burned my eyes and a million questions ran through my head.

What’s wrong? Will she live? Am I going to get to see my Mom again?

I remember riding to the hospital with my step dad behind the ambulance. He did everything to try to make it okay, but it didn’t work. As we raced by the pavilion and the restaurant we had eaten dinner at; I couldn’t help but think of all the memories with my Mom. The closer we got to the hospital the more nervous I got. Why God? Why? I asked myself.

I walked into the hospital ignoring my fear of needles or the stale smell thinking only about where my Mom was so I could run and give her a hug. When I finally got to see there I was too scared to touch or even get near her. She laid there with IV’s in her arms and a tube in her nose. I wanted to pinch myself and wake up from this horrible nightmare. I was so afraid; I had no idea what to say to her. I think she saw the fear in my eyes because she reached for my hand. Hesitantly, I grabbed it. I didn’t want to break anything or pull anything out; I didn’t want to make her hurt anymore.

“Hey honey…”

“Hey Mom.”

“I’m going to be okay.” I let her think I believed her, but looking around it was hard to.

My Mom found out she had a small heart condition that caused her heart to beat really fast and they had to control it with medicine. She had to quit eating or drinking anything that would make her heart race any faster than it should. It was a lifestyle change for her that we still have to help her with sometimes.

The beach is something I always looked forward to because it meant ice cream, sand and lots of fun things with my family. This year was different though. It made me realize that trips were not about the fun rides, the shopping or playing in the ocean. They are about being with my family and not taking one second for granted.