Yes! I just absolutely love doing your laundry!

With a silent prayer, “Dear Lord PLEASE let my roommates get the hint with this costume” and a swing of the dressing room door, I shout “TA DA!” “Hayley, you’re wearing a maid costume! How fitting, you’re always cleaning, haha, its hilarious!” The words are sputtered out of my roommate's mouth as she gasps for air between huge belts of laughter. I try to smile, knowing that I, of course, won’t be a French maid for Halloween and think to myself, "Of course this costume is fitting, since I seem to be the cleaning lady of our household!” I should have expected the costume would get this reaction; why would I think that seeing me in the get-up would make the light bulb above my roommates’ heads turn on? Obviously subliminal messages don’t work on these two girls, but honestly WHY can’t they learn to clean after themselves?

This summer my father bought me my first house. I felt like the luckiest girl in the world. Nineteen and already had a place of my own. I remember my dad telling me, “Now Hayley, this is a huge responsibility, I want you to take care of this house because it's yours." Well my father should be beaming since the house is always spotless, no thanks to my roommates of course.

Each of my two roommates falls into one specific category.

Roommate number one, Miss "LoveDust," should be closely examined. Yes, I certainly appreciate the fact that your father bought us a Dyson X25534 Supercharged Industrial Strength vacuum, but does that exempt you from ever using it? The carpet in the house was brand new when my roommates and I moved in. Note: if you get new carpet be aware that little balls of fuzz and lint will quickly take over your entire house, since the material isn't used to being stepped on. However, Miss LoveDust doesn't seem to notice the golf ball sized lint sitting outside her door. I, armed with the vacuum and a fierce look, attempt to tackle the spiderweb of dust and lint outside her door. The hallway to her room, having accumulated so much lint, clogs the vacuum, and who shall clean it? Why, ME of course! I have begun to wonder if maybe the dust accumulation is comforting to her, sort of like a dirty blanket a toddler carries around constantly. Or, is it possible she just thinks the dust magically disappears? I guess either explanation will have to work, until Miss LoveDust realizes that the fairies she thinks clean her room are actually moi.

Roommate number 2, Miss "Oh MY! Did I leave that in the washing machine?" A long name, yes, but completely fitting. I will admit that I don't do laundry every day, but the once or twice a week chore is not that bothersome to me. However, it does become obnoxious when I carry a huge load of dirty clothes across the house to the laundry room and the washer or dryer is filled with clothes that, guess what, aren't mine. How Miss "Oh MY!" can put clothes in the washing machine and completely forget about them for days at a time is beyond me. In the beginning I would move the clothes into the dryer, set it, and just huff to myself. Now, I find great pleasure in plopping the damp, musty clothes on her lovely down comforter. Then, when she returns home she utters the phrase for which she is named, "Oh MY! Did I leave that in the washing machine?"

I know I should confront my roommates, however, it just seems useless because I know that for a possible two weeks the chores will get done, then it's back to the norm. I presume I shall continue waking up daily to put on my invisible apron and nametag and waltz around like I'm a cleaning lady at the Hilton.